after a long break, i went back on the apps in october 2026. i'm using bumble at the moment, because i already had it on my phone from when i was using bumble bff. also they're less annoying now that they removed the whole "the woman has to text first" feature (i still can't believe they managed to become the "feminist dating app" because of that).
everyone knows dating apps suck but anyway. here's how that's been going for me.
launched my new dating app profile into the world
the first person i was feeling some interest towards casually dropped into our conversation that he was in a long distance open relationship with a girl in finland. there was no mention of this on his profile. needless to say i lost interest.
my first date had to cancel because public transport wasn't working due to the large-scale protests happening in france that day. rescheduled for wednesday.
my second first date was supposed to be a museum date but the museum was also closed due to the aforementioned protests. this man (a chemistry phd student from france) was leaning against a pole reading a book when i arrived. we walked around the city admiring the aftermath of the previous day's unrest and eventually ended up in the same neighbourhood every "idk let's just chill" date in marseille does. i then realised that the bar we were getting drinks from was the same bar that my ex had gotten us drinks from on our first date and needed to immediately see 5 things, touch 4 things, etc.
overall the date was a bit awkward. it was a classic case of "man doesn't know how to ask questions" where the conversation stalled whenever i wasn't carrying it. i was glad to realise that i had forgotten half of my choir music at home so i had a good excuse to end things early.
the re-scheduled first date was with a physics phd student from lebanon (i was not purposefully seeking out scientists it just happened). we live in the same neighbourhood and he was coming straight from work, so we met up at a bagel cafe nearby. the place itself was definitely not the best for a first date: bright white lighting, not a single other person in there apart from one man that i see on my street sometimes who was talking very loudly with the barista, neither of us were hungry and the drinks were not good. the guy was nice though.
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felt kind of insane about the concept of "moving on"
went through every single person between the ages of 25-35 within a 20 km radius??? i swear there were about 500 identical men and 20 women (half of whom were in open relationships, none of whom i matched with)
set up a date with an artist from peru for thursday afternoon
lebanese physicist reappeared and invited me...to his phd defense? i told him that was a bit intense for a second date and he disappeared again.
the date with the peruvian artist was really fun but i wasn't really attracted to him and also he seemed to have a kind of unhealthy relationship with alcohol. it's too bad, i felt like we could have been compatible in a lot of ways otherwise. the funniest to me was that i knew he was a taurus and then he turned out to be the Most taurus to ever taurus - like, obsessed with food and into chilling and funny in kind of a smart-ass way and a serial monogamist and he even had a septum. (i'm a taurus too, for reference)
i gave in and downloaded hinge. i've been kind of avoiding it because that's where i met my ex.
saw my ex's profile and it's exactly the same except for two pictures i took of him and one selfie that he sent me when we were together :D
had my first hinge date! we didn't text much beforehand so i didn't really know anything about him other than he does sports and goes to protests but he turned out to be pretty cool. he's a vfx artist, has travelled a lot and wants to settle down in marseille, has a cute lil earring, and was quite obviously into me lol. i told him i'd be down to see him again this weekend.
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